My dear late friend, Reeshemah told me when I went to her for business coaching that I was wasting my time trying to sell stuff. She told me that every time we went somewhere people asked me about parenting. Reeshemah reminded me that my husband and I were raising amazing kids and that we had a responsibility to share that with others.
All that went through my mind was how many ways I was a complete failure. We have struggled financially, many times not knowing how we were going to feed our kids. My kids are on the C team for sports, makes some B's, and are in the second band and orchestra. I love to write but my ADD shows. I get depressed, I am sensitive, whatever you can do wrong in life, I am sure I do it. Who in the world would want to listen to me? I clearly don't have all the answers. But maybe that is the key. Maybe I have just messed up so many times that might slowly be getting this parenting thing.
I would love to know there was another mom out there, struggling like me. When I look at Facebook and see how perfect everyone else looks, I want to know I can come somewhere and be real. My kids don't like me right now, my house is dirty, and I want to call it quits. But I am trying my hardest and do my best. And my best is enough. Because tomorrow I will do more and learn from today.
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Wednesday, August 20, 2014
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
New Year, New Words
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The last few weeks everyone has started to "turn over a new leaf." Last year my husband and I vowed to lose weight. I am proud to say that we lost about 30 pounds a piece. So I started thinking, what do I want to work on this year? And the answer was obvious to me, I want to work on the words that come out of my mouth and the ones that run through my mind. Here is my list.
1) I don't have time. I can't stand hearing this words from other people. Sometimes I want to scream, we all have the same time, just say it wasn't important. I think we feel important if we can prove how busy we are running around but how many of us miss our favorite TV show? Instead I am going to start saying, it is not a priority right now.
2) I'll start/do it tomorrow. If it is important, I am going to start RIGHT NOW! I don't have to wait until Monday or January 1st. Instead I am going to say Carpe Diem!
3) My kids can wait. No one really says this out loud. But as a mom trying to balance 30 different things sometimes your kids get put on the back burner. It is okay to go on a date with your husband or go for a walk. That isn't what I am talking about. How many times are we so busy helping others that the people in our own family misses out? Or how many times have I answered emails, talked on the phone, or reposted something from Facebook while my kids wanted to talk to me? Instead my children will get my time and the best of it!
4)That's not fair. This isn't an easy lesson for grown ups either. Life isn't going to be fair and waiting around for it to change is a waste of time. Instead I am going to be grateful for hard work.
5)I don't care. I am a very sensitive person. My husband who doesn't have an emotional bone in his body can not understand why things bother me. So I started pretending I don't care. I say it aloud when someone says something unkind or I mutter it under my breath when my heart is breaking but the truth is I do. And it makes me, well me. I do care. Instead I am going to allow myself to feel whatever I am feeling and then get over it.
6) That hurts my feelings. On the other hand, I can control my feelings. People will say mean things, do thoughtless stuff, not like me. My self worth can not be tied to anyone else but my Father in Heaven. I have to be okay with who I am and not judge me on the people who only see 10% of what goes on in my life. Instead I am give the power of my worth back to God and myself.
7) I don't want to get in the middle of it. I hate those words! The world does not need any more middle ground, on the fence people! Stand up for what you believe in. Fight for the things that you hold dear. You can't get where you want to go if you don't know where you want to go in the first place. Instead I will be bold with my beliefs.
8) I just stay up a few more minutes. I should have made this number one! I can not soar with the eagles if I am up with the owls. I have to get the rest I need so I can have the strength to make my days matter. Instead I am going to set a bed time and keep it.
9) That person should...... The minute I start to judge someone else, I need to take a look inside myself. If I have time to become the expert on someone else's life I must not be doing enough in mine. I want people to become the best version of themselves when they are around me because they know I love them and see their worth and strengths. Instead I am going to keep my mouth shut.
10) I have to do it. Nope, I don't. I want to do the things that will bring the most joy to my life, my families life, and the people around me . I might not want to do dishes but it makes my house a better place to live in and I want that. Instead I will say, I want to do that.
The last few weeks everyone has started to "turn over a new leaf." Last year my husband and I vowed to lose weight. I am proud to say that we lost about 30 pounds a piece. So I started thinking, what do I want to work on this year? And the answer was obvious to me, I want to work on the words that come out of my mouth and the ones that run through my mind. Here is my list.
1) I don't have time. I can't stand hearing this words from other people. Sometimes I want to scream, we all have the same time, just say it wasn't important. I think we feel important if we can prove how busy we are running around but how many of us miss our favorite TV show? Instead I am going to start saying, it is not a priority right now.
2) I'll start/do it tomorrow. If it is important, I am going to start RIGHT NOW! I don't have to wait until Monday or January 1st. Instead I am going to say Carpe Diem!
3) My kids can wait. No one really says this out loud. But as a mom trying to balance 30 different things sometimes your kids get put on the back burner. It is okay to go on a date with your husband or go for a walk. That isn't what I am talking about. How many times are we so busy helping others that the people in our own family misses out? Or how many times have I answered emails, talked on the phone, or reposted something from Facebook while my kids wanted to talk to me? Instead my children will get my time and the best of it!
4)That's not fair. This isn't an easy lesson for grown ups either. Life isn't going to be fair and waiting around for it to change is a waste of time. Instead I am going to be grateful for hard work.
5)I don't care. I am a very sensitive person. My husband who doesn't have an emotional bone in his body can not understand why things bother me. So I started pretending I don't care. I say it aloud when someone says something unkind or I mutter it under my breath when my heart is breaking but the truth is I do. And it makes me, well me. I do care. Instead I am going to allow myself to feel whatever I am feeling and then get over it.
6) That hurts my feelings. On the other hand, I can control my feelings. People will say mean things, do thoughtless stuff, not like me. My self worth can not be tied to anyone else but my Father in Heaven. I have to be okay with who I am and not judge me on the people who only see 10% of what goes on in my life. Instead I am give the power of my worth back to God and myself.
7) I don't want to get in the middle of it. I hate those words! The world does not need any more middle ground, on the fence people! Stand up for what you believe in. Fight for the things that you hold dear. You can't get where you want to go if you don't know where you want to go in the first place. Instead I will be bold with my beliefs.
8) I just stay up a few more minutes. I should have made this number one! I can not soar with the eagles if I am up with the owls. I have to get the rest I need so I can have the strength to make my days matter. Instead I am going to set a bed time and keep it.
9) That person should...... The minute I start to judge someone else, I need to take a look inside myself. If I have time to become the expert on someone else's life I must not be doing enough in mine. I want people to become the best version of themselves when they are around me because they know I love them and see their worth and strengths. Instead I am going to keep my mouth shut.
10) I have to do it. Nope, I don't. I want to do the things that will bring the most joy to my life, my families life, and the people around me . I might not want to do dishes but it makes my house a better place to live in and I want that. Instead I will say, I want to do that.
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